RADIATION IN A CAN
|“Canned Radiation” from Three Mile Island produced byBrenster Enterprises ofEtters Pennsylvania.This was probably the most popular souvenir associated with the accident at Three Mile Island.
The six suggested uses indicated on the label were:
1. Remove label and tell your enemy its laughing gas.
2. Energy free night light (illuminates in darkness).
3. Mix with cold cream for that radiant beauty.
4. Instant male sterilization (sniff twice daily).
5. Use as a room air freshener.
6. Toothpaste recipe: mix 3 to 1 ratio with baking soda, for ever glowing smile.
Size: 4.5″ high, 3″ diameter.
cat helps wash the dishes
PICTURE NOT RELATED TO ARTICLE-JUST RANDOM!
Published November 16, 2009 Immortal More Info »
A lady about 8 months pregnant got on a bus.
She noticed the man opposite her was smiling at her.
She immediately moved to another seat.
This time the smile turned into a grin, so she moved again.
The man seemed more amused.
When on the fourth move, the man burst out laughing,
she complained to the driver and he had the man arrested.
The case came up in court.
The judge asked the man (about 20 years old)
what he had to say for himself.
The man replied,
‘Well your Honor, it was like this:
when the lady got on the bus,
I couldn’t help but notice her condition.
She sat down under a sign that said,
‘The Double Mint Twins are coming’ and I grinned.
Then she moved and sat under a sign that said,
‘Logan’s Liniment will reduce the swelling,’ and I had to smile.
Then she placed herself under a deodorant sign that said,
‘William’s Big Stick Did the Trick,’ and I could hardly contain myself.
But, Your Honor, when she moved the fourth time
and sat under a sign that said,
‘Goodyear Rubber could have prevented this Accident!’
… I just lost it.’
READ ALL ABOUT IT- ABOUT THE ABSURD,WEIRD,HUMOR AND MIND BOGGLING
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- Feudalism: You have two cows. Your lord takes some of the milk.
- Pure Socialism: You have two cows. The government takes them and puts them in a barn with everyone else’s cows. You have to take care of all the cows. The government gives you all the milk you need.
- Bureaucratic Socialism: Your cows are cared for by ex-chicken farmers. You have to take care of the chickens the government took from the chicken farmers. The government gives you as much milk and eggs the regulations say you should need.
- Fascism: You have two cows. The government takes both, hires you to take care of them, and sells you the milk.
- Pure Communism: You have two cows. Your neighbors help you take care of them, and you all share the milk.
- Real World Communism: You share two cows with your neighbors. You and your neighbors bicker about who has the most “ability” and who has the most “need”. Meanwhile, no one works, no one gets any milk, and the cows drop dead of starvation.
- Russian Communism: You have two cows. You have to take care of them, but the government takes all the milk. You steal back as much milk as you can and sell it on the black market.
- Perestroika: You have two cows. You have to take care of them, but the Mafia takes all the milk. You steal back as much milk as you can and sell it on the “free” market.
- Cambodian Communism: You have two cows. The government takes both and shoots you.
- Militarianism: You have two cows. The government takes both and drafts you.
- Totalitarianism: You have two cows. The government takes them and denies they ever existed. Milk is banned.
- Pure Democracy: You have two cows. Your neighbors decide who gets the milk.
- Representative Democracy: You have two cows. Your neighbors pick someone to tell you who gets the milk.
- British Democracy: You have two cows. You feed them sheeps’ brains and they go mad. The government doesn’t do anything.
- Bureaucracy: You have two cows. At first the government regulates what you can feed them and when you can milk them. Then it pays you not to milk them. Then it takes both, shoots one, milks the other and pours the milk down the drain. Then it requires you to fill out forms accounting for the missing cows.
- Pure Anarchy: You have two cows. Either you sell the milk at a fair price or your neighbors try to take the cows and kill you.
- Pure Capitalism: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.
- Capitalism: You don’t have any cows. The bank will not lend you money to buy cows, because you don’t have any cows to put up as collateral.
- Enviromentalism: You have two cows. The government bans you from milking or killing them.
- Political Correctness: You are associated with (the concept of “ownership” is a symbol of the phallo-centric, war mongering, intolerant past) two differently – aged (but no less valuable to society) bovines of non-specified gender.
- Surrealism: You have two giraffes. The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.