cat helps wash the dishes
PICTURE NOT RELATED TO ARTICLE-JUST RANDOM!
Published November 16, 2009 Immortal More Info »
A lady about 8 months pregnant got on a bus.
She noticed the man opposite her was smiling at her.
She immediately moved to another seat.
This time the smile turned into a grin, so she moved again.
The man seemed more amused.
When on the fourth move, the man burst out laughing,
she complained to the driver and he had the man arrested.
The case came up in court.
The judge asked the man (about 20 years old)
what he had to say for himself.
The man replied,
‘Well your Honor, it was like this:
when the lady got on the bus,
I couldn’t help but notice her condition.
She sat down under a sign that said,
‘The Double Mint Twins are coming’ and I grinned.
Then she moved and sat under a sign that said,
‘Logan’s Liniment will reduce the swelling,’ and I had to smile.
Then she placed herself under a deodorant sign that said,
‘William’s Big Stick Did the Trick,’ and I could hardly contain myself.
But, Your Honor, when she moved the fourth time
and sat under a sign that said,
‘Goodyear Rubber could have prevented this Accident!’
… I just lost it.’
READ ALL ABOUT IT- ABOUT THE ABSURD,WEIRD,HUMOR AND MIND BOGGLING
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- Feudalism: You have two cows. Your lord takes some of the milk.
- Pure Socialism: You have two cows. The government takes them and puts them in a barn with everyone else’s cows. You have to take care of all the cows. The government gives you all the milk you need.
- Bureaucratic Socialism: Your cows are cared for by ex-chicken farmers. You have to take care of the chickens the government took from the chicken farmers. The government gives you as much milk and eggs the regulations say you should need.
- Fascism: You have two cows. The government takes both, hires you to take care of them, and sells you the milk.
- Pure Communism: You have two cows. Your neighbors help you take care of them, and you all share the milk.
- Real World Communism: You share two cows with your neighbors. You and your neighbors bicker about who has the most “ability” and who has the most “need”. Meanwhile, no one works, no one gets any milk, and the cows drop dead of starvation.
- Russian Communism: You have two cows. You have to take care of them, but the government takes all the milk. You steal back as much milk as you can and sell it on the black market.
- Perestroika: You have two cows. You have to take care of them, but the Mafia takes all the milk. You steal back as much milk as you can and sell it on the “free” market.
- Cambodian Communism: You have two cows. The government takes both and shoots you.
- Militarianism: You have two cows. The government takes both and drafts you.
- Totalitarianism: You have two cows. The government takes them and denies they ever existed. Milk is banned.
- Pure Democracy: You have two cows. Your neighbors decide who gets the milk.
- Representative Democracy: You have two cows. Your neighbors pick someone to tell you who gets the milk.
- British Democracy: You have two cows. You feed them sheeps’ brains and they go mad. The government doesn’t do anything.
- Bureaucracy: You have two cows. At first the government regulates what you can feed them and when you can milk them. Then it pays you not to milk them. Then it takes both, shoots one, milks the other and pours the milk down the drain. Then it requires you to fill out forms accounting for the missing cows.
- Pure Anarchy: You have two cows. Either you sell the milk at a fair price or your neighbors try to take the cows and kill you.
- Pure Capitalism: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.
- Capitalism: You don’t have any cows. The bank will not lend you money to buy cows, because you don’t have any cows to put up as collateral.
- Enviromentalism: You have two cows. The government bans you from milking or killing them.
- Political Correctness: You are associated with (the concept of “ownership” is a symbol of the phallo-centric, war mongering, intolerant past) two differently – aged (but no less valuable to society) bovines of non-specified gender.
- Surrealism: You have two giraffes. The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.
‘The Weed Fairy’ Visits Seattle, Gives out Pot
SEATTLE May 29, 2014 (AP)
By MANUEL VALDES Associated Press
A woman who calls herself the “Weed Fairy” distributed free nuggets of marijuana to people in Seattle over Memorial Day weekend, taping the free pot on fliers around a city neighborhood.
The woman, 23-year-old Yeni Sleidi, says she does it to amuse people and to give them a break from everyday stress.
She said 50 fliers had nuggets taped to them.
“People mostly laughed,” Sleidi said Wednesday.
The woman said she first came up with the idea in New York, where she lived during the government shutdown, because several of her friends were affected by it. She wanted to distract them from the stress. Her actions, though, drew plenty of coverage from the media.
“I’m not sure what the thought process was but I thought people would be amused by it,” she said.
The fliers posted in Seattle came with the message: “These are tough times. Take this weed.” Sleidi posted her free marijuana in one of Seattle’s most urban neighborhoods, known for its nightlife and counterculture.
Washington is one of two states that legalized recreational marijuana in 2012.
Sleidi said it was the first time she felt comfortable with attaching her name to her deeds.
“I felt so relaxed about it… I wouldn’t feel comfortable doing it elsewhere in the country,” she said.
A call to the Seattle Police Department to ask about the pot distribution effort was not immediately returned.